


I am NOT your father

by AAMain



Series: Time Travel Trash [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Kid Luke, Kylo Ren Swears A Lot, No Romance, Time Travel, Young Luke, just for fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:00:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23112838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AAMain/pseuds/AAMain
Summary: Great. He travelled not only through space, but also time. Other than that, five-year-old Luke Skywalker thought he was his father. This is just great.So, what if in ep9, when Kylo's ship crushed in the sands, he … ended up somewhere else ... with someone else?
Relationships: Kylo Ren & Luke Skywalker, Kylo Ren & Rey, Kylo Ren/Rey, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: Time Travel Trash [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1714552
Comments: 42
Kudos: 102





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My mind slipped and I wrote this. I am a devoted Reylo shipper (you can check my other works) and I wrote this one just for fun. I hope you could have fun reading it.

When his TIE silencer exploded and crushed into the sands, Kylo Ren’s mind went black. Later when his conscious came back, the first thing he realized was that there were sands everywhere.

Literally, every single place of his body where air once got access to was filled with sands.

He snorted away a chunk through his nose and used the Force to get rid of the rest.

Then he realized another thing.

_Where was his fucking clothes?_ He was naked in a kriffing desert!

Wait, where was Rey? Last time he checked she was making unforgivable damage to his TIE Silencer. NO, no no, wait again, where _was_ the TIE Silencer? Surly a fighter that size could not just got blew up to the dust? Why didn’t he see any wreckage?

Hold on. This is not even the same desert. There were two suns in the sky.

_This was fuck-the-Maker Tatooine._

So now fighter explode could cause space travel? And couldn’t he just travel to some place nice? Did it really have to be another desert in nowhere?

Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order made a decision that when he conquered the Resistance ——of course those drowned rats wouldn’t last long—— he would obliterate every single desert planet in the galaxy.

But before that could be done, he would need some clothes. Otherwise his obituary would be a huge joke.

He was trying to figure out the direction when he sensed something, not something, _someone._ Maybe it was still something. He would never forget that Force signature no matter how weak that was. It was Luke fucking Skywalker. The one who betrayed him and pushed him into the abyss. Well of that later part maybe he owed Luke a thank-you.

If Luke dared to show up at this moment, he swore to himself he would find a way to kill the Jedi spirit. He turned around and saw no one. Then he looked down. There was a boy about his waist high with straw yellow hair and mossy eyes looking up at him.

“Are you Dad?” was the first thing young Luke said.

Great. He travelled not only through space, but also time. Now five-year-old Luke Skywalker thought he was his father. This is just _great_.

Luke gave Kylo the gauze cape he wore to keep off the sun and heat. Kylo, who was still brooding over this time and space travel thing, finally got something to cover his private parts while trudging beside Luke through burning sands. He tried to contact Rey through their Force bond. There was nothing. Of course there was nothing. This was what, like fifty, sixty years ago? He doubted whether Rey’s parents were born at the moment. Damn the Force dyad. It just couldn’t work the way he wanted, not even once.

Luke babbled all the way about his life, about this nothing-for-good planet, about his aunt and uncle, their ranch, and how he never saw his parents until today. Kylo tried so hard not to silence him with the Force. He couldn’t just frighten Luke away. He needed water, and this Luke was the best hope he got at present. But he didn’t have to listen to all the nonsense about Luke’s childhood life.

“Look, kid. I am not your father, so just save your words.”

“Are you not?” Luke raised his head, “But you are so tall, and big.” 

Luke’s eyes suspiciously glanced over his cape.

Somehow Kylo was amused.

“So every tall, big man is your father, then.” Kylo felt a bit sorry for Darth Vader.

“Of course not. There is a scar on your face. You must be a tough guy. Only tough guys have scars like that.” Luke said with earnest.

“I guess.” A tough guy with a tough dyad, indeed.

“Do you know how to fly a ship?”

“That I do.”

“Then you _are_ my father.” Luke nodded to himself, “My aunt and uncle never mentioned my parents. But I think my father is a pilot. A tall, strong and tough one. You could be my father, right?”

Part of Kylo Ren wanted to laugh out loud, another part of him wanted to give this Luke a good shake to put some sense into his messed up little head.

“Really? I ain’t even blond. I have dark hair and dark eyes.” Kylo teased.

“Oh, that.” Luke chewed his lower lip, “I thought about that, too. Maybe I take my mother’s look. Right? Father?”

Kylo was lost for words. It wasn’t easy to reason with a child, especially when the child was Luke Skywalker. His thoughts were interrupt when Luke yelled, “Here we are! We are home!”

So this was where Luke lived. Several stone domes in the sands. Luke’s aunt was there to greet them. She was a warmhearted woman. Kylo Ren explained his presence was due to a space jump malfunction. He could play nice, and he would. He needed to figure out what was going on and find a way back. To achieve that he would need clothes, food and maybe a ship.

Mrs. Lars found him some clothes to wear. She said in an apologetic tone: “It must have bothered you that Luke said you are his father.”

“It’s alright.” It was truly a bit unexpected that he really didn’t care that much, “I’d be leaving soon, or at least I hope.”

When he was fully dressed, Luke rushed towards him and hugged his leg with a “Father!”.

Okay, maybe it was a bit early to say he didn’t care that much. Calling him father is one thing, but this? This was where he drew the line.

“What. Are. You. Doing!” Kylo said through his gritted teeth, “Let. Go!”

“Never!” Luke wailed, “Father you’d be leaving!”

Kylo closed his eyes for a brief instant to make sure he didn’t send Luke fly across the room with the Force.

“I won’t say it again, I am NOT your father! Stop calling me that! Now let go! I hate people touching me!” Well except Rey, he supplemented silently to himself.

“Sorry, Daddy.” Luke finally let go with reluctance.

Oh fuck the Stars the boy’s got some serious issues.

\---TBC---

  
or maybe not


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright alright. I know I said the story was finished, but you guys gave me the most amazing feedbacks so somehow I managed another chapter. And I ain't too familiar with the original series (I watched those movies like years ago), please don't blame me if I got anything wrong. And the tense may be a bit confusing but I'm pretty sure you guys can understand. So just enjoy! <3

“What did I literally just say?” Kylo scolded.

“Don’t call you Father?”

“Now tell me, what’s the difference between Daddy and Father?”

“Daddy ... is not Father?” Luke answered, then he muttered in a low voice which was just loud enough for Kylo to hear, “You didn’t say don’t call you Daddy.”

Alright, this is not gonna end well.

“No Daddy.”

“Dad?”

“No.”

“Papa?”

“No!”

“Da?”

“Damn it!”

“Is that a yes?”

“No! That. Is. A. NO! And No! No Da!”

Lip pursed and brow knitted, Luke fell silent. Just when Kylo thought Luke was running out of ways of saying father and started to gloat, Luke said,  
“My old man?”

Okay, breathe, Kylo Ren, breathe. Good. You can’t kill him. Never kill people when you were doing time travel shit. Especially this is your uncle. That’s right. No killing. Now focus.

“No. Stop calling me anything that implies father because I am NOT your father!” Kylo used to believe that General Hux was a pain in the ass, well now that he thought about it, dealing with Hux was much more easier, just choked him with the Force and Hux would know the right thing to do.

“Fine.” Luke puffed his cheek, then deflated, “What should I call you then, fa—— sir?”

“My name is Ky——” Oh no, wait there, is it okay to say that? Shit, he never did this before. How on earth does time travel work? He couldn’t stay forever. What if years later Luke finds out that his nephew changes his name to the same one as his imaginary father? Oh boy, not just the name, Luke saw his face. Shit, shit, shit. Maybe he should be glad that his crossguard didn’t travel with him. No, stop thinking about your fucking light saber. Focus! Kylo Ren! This shit is serious! And don’t you dare to panic!

“What?” Luke was still there, waiting for an answer.

“Rey.” Kylo blurted out. Rey was the first name came to his mind except his own.

“Ray?” Luke tilted his little head.

“Yeah, Ray. Just call me that. Now leave me alone, I need to meditate.” He regretted his words the moment he said them out loud.

Okay, now this stupid kid is gonna act like that Star-damn-it traitor FN something who kept yelling “Rey! Rey! Rey!” all the time. Fuck him!

Later Kylo would have more regrets because every time when Luke “Ray! Ray! Ray!”ed him, his first response was like “Rey? Where is she? Did she come to save me at last?” before he realized it was the kid calling him. Just ...... FUCK!

But Kylo was too eager to get rid of this whole Father drama to foresee that. He really needed some meditation to think straight. Clearly he wasn’t doing that right now. Ray? Really, what was he thinking?

Kylo found a place to sit, with his legd crossed, he let the Force guide his thoughts. Luke silently watched him for a long time, as if to make sure that Kylo wouldn’t run off before going away to play by himself.

So this time and space travel thing was like entering into a hidden path unintentionally. He opened one door and appeared at the other. But such doors wouldn’t keep open all the time. If he wanted to go back, he had to wait for the door to open again. And somehow he had this feeling that those doors are not gonna open any time soon. And there were still many uncertainties about time travel. So he might as well stay here instead of wandering around making more changes of unknown results. He couldn’t risk losing Rey when he returned, he would be stuck here for an awfully long time.

Later that day when Mr. Lars returned from his work on the ranch, Kylo explained his presence and told the same pretext. But Owen Lars kept staring at him with suspicion and uneasiness. Finally Mr. Lars said “I need a private word with my wife.” Kylo nodded politely and left for another room but his Force stayed with Mr. Lars. Obviously they were gonna have a conversation about him, he needed to know.

“I don’t like that man, he seems ... evil.” Mr. Lars warned his wife.

Hurrah! Ten points for Owen Lars. Finally there is someone with some sense, come meet the Prince of the Dark Side, you suckers!

“He seems fine to me. You can’t mean to get him out now? It’s not safe out there in the night, the sands will kill him.” So Mrs. Lars did have a bleeding heart.

“And that’s none of our business. He must weighs like what, two hundred pounds? What if he attacks us when we sleep?” Retorted Mr. Lars.

Hey, hey! No points for you, Mr. Lars! Two hundred pounds? That’s insulting! Surly he can’t be more than one hundred and eighty? Right? Two hundred, huh? Does he really look like two hundred pounds? Wait, is that why Rey refused him all the time? Is it even possible that a woman would reject a man just because he looks like he weighs two hundred pounds? Oh fuck Kylo Ren, stop thinking about Rey all the time! You knew she didn’t say no because of that! Did you?

“I don’t believe that, that poor man got nothing on him when Luke found him. Besides, I think Luke quite likes him.” 

And thinks he is the Father, stupid kid.

“It doesn’t matter, he——”

Mr. Lars was interrupted by a tiny voice.

“Uncle?” No one seemed to know when did Luke sneaked into the room, “Please don’t make him leave, pretty please?”

“Hey, kiddo. You don’t understand, that man could be dangerous.”

“He is not.” Luke insisted, “He is not gonna hurt me.”

Says the one who died under my blade, Kylo thought bitterly.

“And how can you be so sure?”

“Because he _is_ my father.” 

Okay, now this is gonna be fun.  
  
\---TBC---

  
or maybe not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again! This is very important! I can't promise there will be a chapter 3, just don't build up your hope yet. BTW, my beta reader wants to know is there a specific name for Kylo/Luke ship? Or do you guys have any good ideas? Although this story isn't about romance but I would also like to hear your thoughts.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I finally came up with a new chapter! Hope you could enjoy!

Then there was a tangle of surprise, outrage, comfort, denial mixed with questions and shouting.

But Kylo turned his attention away when Luke started to wail and cry, half screamed, half sobbed through his desperate words, “Why won’t he be back? I am being so good! _Why?_ ”

He could almost taste the bile on his tongue, almost feel the knot right between his ribs. It was not like what he had once felt Rey’s, as if the feelings were his own, visceral yet a bit bizarre. This was different, this was too familiar. Because once he would ask himself the same question over and over again.

_Why can’t he stay? Is it because I wasn’t being good enough?_

Then suddenly all the feelings which he couldn’t yet put name on began to pulse through his veins, surging and threatening to break.

Stop it Kylo Ren, you stop it right now.

He forced his emotions down and went back to meditation, clearing his thoughts.

* * *

  
Came morning, everyone looked like nothing happened last night. Mr. Lars went early to the ranch, the rest three of them were having breakfast together.

“Do you need to contact someone?” Mrs. Lars asked.

“I already did.” Kylo lied without blinking, “But they were in the inner rim, it could take them a long time to get here.”

“It’s alright, you can stay.” Mrs. Lars nodded.

“You are being too kind, ma’am.” Kylo made the courtesy.

“While you are here, would you please keep an eye on Luke? It’s busy season on the ranch, my husband could really use my help.”

He should have stood up, flipped the table, and asked her, “Do I fucking look like a babysitter to you?”

But he didn’t, he sat there like an idiot and stared at her with a blank face, thinking _what’s that suppose to mean_? and Mrs. Lars must have took his dumb reaction as a “Yes” and smiled at him in gratitude.

So later when Luke headed into the sands to “have some fun”, Kylo grudgingly shuffled behind him, carefully keeping the distance. He’s got no better things to do anyway. The good thing was this time Luke didn’t chatter all the way, and Kylo was more than happy to comply with the silence. At some point they reached a huge rock, and Luke rounded to its back, squatted down and began to dig something with his hands.

What could there be in these fucking sands?

“Gotcha!” Luke exclaimed with triumph, then all of a sudden his face crumbled.

“Aw! It bit me——” Luke loosened his grip out of pain and a small, lizard-like creature jumped out of his chubby hands, “No! Catch it!”

Kylo would swear to all the stars in the galaxy that he did NOT catch that thing because Luke asked him to. He caught that thing simply because he was too quick and agile to let that pathetic creature escape. That’s right, his response capacity was one in a million kind of good. But he would neither deny the satisfaction when he snatched it between his fingers, feeling it writhing and twisting in his hand, nor the fact that his ego slightly inflated a little bit when Luke let out a “Yay” and looked at him in awe and delight.

“What is this?” Kylo demanded, handing the creature back to Luke.

“Some kind of sand lizard, I guess. I’m not sure its proper name, we call it _stinkylight_.” Luke took over the creature, gingerly grabbed its tail this time, staying away from its teeth and claws.

“Why would you call it stinky——” Oh, FUCK! It did not! Kylo Ren figured out the answer before he finished his question. Because he _smelled_ it! _Stinkylight_! Fuck him! He suspiciously put his hand under his nostrils, and he almost threw up all over Luke’s face.

Luke smelled it too. He twitched his nose and sighed, “You must have touched its gland when you catch it, you see, it’s right there, behind its eyes.” Luke stretched his arm and lifted it towards Kylo so that he could see the gland himself.

“Get that thing away from me!” Kylo snapped, “You should have said something before you told me to catch it!”

 _Emm, what about “you didn’t catch it because Luke told you to”?_ A voice whispered in Kylo’s head.

 _Just shut the fuck up!_ Kylo snarled back in his mind.

“I’m sorry.” Luke said, but judging from his face, he was NOT sorry at all, “It will wear off, that smell, in a couple of days or so.”

“In a couple of——” Kylo wanted to scream, wanted to smash something with his Crossguard. But here he was in a desert with Luke, there was nothing for him to smash except endless sands and rocks, and his Crossguard wasn’t even with him. Before he could think twice he raked through his hair with his fingers in distress, _with the fingers which had touched the gland._

Kylo froze for a couple of seconds, then he put down his hand in a very very slow motion, trying not to think about what he had done. He wished he was still on the Destroyer, so he could push himself out of the airlock and be done with it. Why didn’t that TIE fighter crush just kill him already? Gave him a clean death and exempted him from whatever this is.

He highly suspected the secretions from the gland were poisonous, because the rest of his day seemed like a blur.

That night while he was sleeping, Kylo heard footsteps in his room. His body tensed immediately, prepared to fight, only to relax when he realized it was just Luke. There was a tap on the shoulder, he opened his eyes and sat up, ready to gave Luke a good lecture about not sneaking into someone else’s room in the middle of night.

“You shouldn’t——”

Luke was holding something in his hands, a glass jar with holes on its lid, something was illuminating dimly inside it.

Right, _stinkylight_.

The light was rather pitiable if Kylo would say, it wasn’t even half as bright as a firefly which he used to catch when he was little. Then again, it must be something rare and miraculous in the eyes of a little boy who spent his entire life on this dull planet.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” Luke said with excitement.

“I ... guess, ehh, yeah.” Kylo’s sleepiness and weariness came back once he excluded the danger.

Luke handed the jar towards Kylo, “There, it’s a gift.”

And Kylo, well, he was going to grab that jar, he swore, this time swore on all the stormtroopers in the First Order, perhaps. But he flinched in the last second when he recalled that nasty smell, and to be fair he was sleepy and tired form the day. So the jar dropped, and with a loud crash, it splintered. The _stinkylight_? There was no longer light in the room.

 _Terrific_ , so he had just set loose a shit bomb, _a literally shit bomb_.

\---TBC---

or maybe not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually get the idea of stinkylight when I went fishing with my dad the other day. And long story short, I ended up chasing dying but jumping fish on the river bank and my hands smelled like fish all day.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's so much fun to write Kylo's self-talking.

Luke panicked.

It’s weird. You know sometimes all you wish to do is to lose it, to stop thinking and let your feelings take control. But, but the moment you realize that someone else is doing your job, you would start to look for your sanity and go get you shit together.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so _so_ SO sorry!” Clearly Luke thought it was _his_ fault that he took his hand off too soon, because of course his mighty Fa——, his mighty Ray couldn’t possibly make such a simple mistake of holding back at the last minute.

“It’s alright.” Kylo got out of bed and was going to clean up the mess.

“No, no—— I made a mistake, I ... I, I shouldn’t ... I should ...”

Yeah yeah yeah. You are gonna make a ton of shitty mistakes in your life and this is hardly one of those.

Luke was too absorbed in his horror and guilt, he didn’t even much notice when Kylo turned on the lights with a flick of finger.

Once the room was lit, Luke saw the broken pieces of the glass jar all over the floor and he started to pick them up as quickly as possible.

Kylo almost joined him, then he decided that Luke would probably soon give it up and leave so he could clean up the mess with a wave of his hand. Why bother burden yourself when you don't have to? So he just stood there and waited, absently scanned the surroundings with his Force, some old habit since he was a teenager.

The sands are quite. Mrs. Lars was a little restless in her sleep. Mr. Lars slept like a dead man. _Guess it would be easy if I did attack you while you were sleeping, old man._ The lizard thing was still somewhere in this room, trying to find a way out. And Luke, well, Luke was ... hiding something.

This little bastard is hiding something from me. Let me see, let me see——Oh.

He didn’t expect what he had found out.

Luke was hiding his pain, those glass fragments had cut his fingers, it hurt. Yet somehow Luke didn’t want him to know.

“Luke.” Kylo called.

Luke stopped picking, Kylo let out a soft sigh and drew Luke close. He checked Luke’s wounds. Those were mere small cuts, which didn’t even bleed much and should heal in the morning. But he knew the wounds hurt no matter what, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I was, I was afraid ...” Luke looked like he was about to burst into tears.

“Shh, shh.” Kylo cooed, “There, there. It’s alright.”

Kylo tried to remember how he was held when he was little, after being naughty and got hurt. Those moments were few, but he managed to find one. He put one forearm under Luke’s bottom and the another around Luke’s back, so he could easily lift Luke up and let Luke’s head rest on his shoulder.

Luke’s little arms wrapped around his neck involuntarily. Luke hold him tight, but not too tight to suffocate him.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Luke was still apologizing, “Please don’t go. I can find you a new one tomorrow.”

Kylo wanted to tell Luke that he had to go, eventually. And perhaps he would brainwash Luke, erase his memory before he left to make sure he wouldn’t disturb the timeline. He also wanted to tell Luke that an illuminating lizard was technically the last thing he needed. But he couldn’t say these words out loud, not now. So he just gently patted Luke’s back and said, “Alright, then.”

Luke nodded frantically into his neck. Kylo was about to snap because he felt Luke had smeared tears, probably with snot, on his skin when Luke said, “Please don’t hate me.”

There was a long moment of silence. Kylo wanted to say something but he found his throat tight and raw. Finally Kylo found his own voice and he thought he was going to tell Luke that he wouldn’t hate him for whatever happened tonight.

I will hate you _some day._ Kylo said to himself, but _not today._

However before he could say anything, Luke had already fallen asleep. Luke’s even breathing on his neck made him itchy, which annoyed him greatly.

_Fucking little bastard._

Kylo ran into Mrs. Lars, who was going to check upon Luke in the middle of night like a responsible parent when he was going to put Luke back into his room.

“What——” Mrs. Lars was taken aback, “Did he sneak into your room? I should——”

Kylo shook his head and said in a hushed voice, “He’s asleep now.”

“I will take it from here.” Mrs. Lars said.

Kylo slowly tore Luke away from his body and handed him to Mrs. Lars. Luke stirred a bit though he didn’t wake up. Mrs. Lars’s hand brushed Kylo’s arm when she took Luke with her. Kylo winced, he didn’t feel comfortable being touched by a stranger.

 _You just hold Luke._ The voice in his head popped up.

 _Luke is—— will be my uncle. He is no stranger._ Kylo argued.

 _That's not what you said the day before._ The voice scorned.

_Go. Away._

_And Luke's definitely got his snot on you._ The voice teased.

_Get the the fuck out of my head!_

The voice retreated.

Once he watched Mrs. Lars tucked Luke in, Kylo’s mind started to race wild.

Does every little kid act like this, or is it just Luke, and himself maybe? Making a mess, doing nothing to help except making it worse, and then going straight to sleep, leaving the chaos behind. Would his own kid act like this one day?

Shit, he was doing it again, thinking about his imaginary child. Well, to be fair, he was already thirty-two, a perfect age to worry about an off-spring as a member of human species.

Anyway, it seemed that his line didn’t do a great job in this. So he had always hoped his kid would be more like the mother than himself.

 _More like who?_ The voice in his head asked out of nowhere.

Fuck! Is there any way to kill the voice in your head? Is it even possible?

 _Fine! More like Rey! Satisfied?_ Kylo retrotted.

 _Uh-huh._ The voice replied.

Darn it! He would find some time to fix that stupid voice when he got back.

Kylo returned to his chamber, got rid of the broken glass and started to search the sneaky lizard, or whatever that thing was.

Good, the creature was gone, he could go back to sleep now. Kylo pulled back the blanket and——

HOLY SHIT.

Can he go back to the “There, it’s a gift.” part and start this all over again with him firmly grabbing the jar? Because it appeared that Luke’s precious _stinkylight_ decided to visit his bed and leave a literally shitty “gift” before it disappeared into the sands.

He guessed he had used the word “literally” too many times these days.

\---TBC---

or maybe not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, things are getting a little bit emotional. If you have anything you want to say, please let me know, I will read and reply every comment. Kudos are also very welcome. I'd really appreciate them.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this was a one-time thing, some silly story that you came up with to entertain yourself while taking an afternoon walk or something. But it seems that I have too many ideas for it. So here we are. And I'm sorry (No, I'm NOT.) to announce that chapter 5 will not be the end of this story.

Tell him again, why was he on his way to catch a lizard with Luke _again_ today?

Right, he said yes when Luke said there will be a new one, so _he_ had asked for it. 

_You are going soft. You are gonna get fucked up one day because of it._ This time, it was the voice in his head that snarled at him.

 _I kind of already did._ He replied sullenly.

And it wasn't until after days of this“lizard hunting” ended up in vain did Kylo finally realize how lucky it was when Luke had captured one in his first attempt. To be frank, he wouldn’t oppose this “desert adventure” if it were not for the fact that he got sun-burnt too easily or that Luke had talked too much.

It wasn’t his fault that his _fair_ fair skin was super sensitive to sunlight, especially there were _two_ fucking suns in the sky, TWO fucking suns! And he didn’t have his helmet, well anyway he guessed he’d be cooked through wearing that thing on a _double_ sunny day in Tatooine, so it was better off without it. Although he did have hoped to borrow some sun cream from Mrs. Lars, he was too self-conscious to ask. How could he ever bring up the question without embarrassing himself? What should he say? Give me your sun cream if you still want me to babysit your adopted nephew? So instead he had borrowed a pair of strong gloves from Mr. Lars. At least there would be no more gland incident this time.

Over the days of this nonsense lizard hunting, and of course during which time he'd checked the "door" from time to time to see when he could leave (yet _unluckily_ there was no sign if it), he had come across all kinds of weird-looking sand creatures. He used to believe no living thing could survive these fucking sands. Yet here he was, seeing sand rats, sand spiders, sand snakes with his own eyes. There were even sand flowers. They were small and not eye-catching at all. But they were beautiful, in their own way. Just like his Rey. Well, not _his_ , not in that way. It's just, Rey _is_ lovely.

Once he mistook one snake for that lizard thing. Seriously, it was of the same color, similar size, and with its body half buried in sands, how could he tell the difference? He was gonna let it go the moment he saw that he got the wrong one. But Luke’s reaction was ... well, how should he put this? Too entertaining?

Because Luke screamed like the airlock malfunction alarm.

“I think I got—— Oh, never mind, it’s just a snake.”

“It’s a WHAT?” Luke was startled.

“A snake, I guess.” Kylo snatched its neck, and let its body and tail dangle in the air, so Luke could see it himself.

“Ahhhhhh——” Luke jumped to his feet in no time and started to run away, he turned around when he believed he had reached a safe distance, which was about twenty feet away and shouted back, “Throw! It! Away! Why did you catch a snake? Eww!”

Okay, so this little jerk is afraid of snakes, _note taken_.

“Are you sure? It’s practically a lizard, without legs of course.” Kylo was smirking then, “Maybe it also shines in the dark. Don’t you wanna find out?” 

Luke waved his arms like crazy, “No! _No!_ NO! Just throw it away!” 

“Pity.” Kylo did have the intention of taking the snake with him but he thought better of it for the sake of his hearing.

And let’s go back to the “Luke talking too much” part.

He’d never knew that a five-year-old imp could have so many questions. He didn’t asked that many questions when he was little, did he? And he was sure as fuck that he really sucked at answering them.

In his defense, the last person who he had answered to, was dead, like _dead_ dead, killed by him, to be precise.

He had managed to stall off a series of silly small talk questions like “Where did you live?” “Where were you born?” “What’s your favorite game/color/weather/music?” “Do you like broccoli?”. And FYI, he hated broccoli, he could put up with carrots, but broccoli? Never. And really, where did Luke even know about broccoli? They don’t grow in sands, do they?

“So, what are you, exactly?” That’s how the conversation went to a disaster.

“What am I?” What’s that suppose to mean?

“Well, you said you know how to fly a ship. But you didn’t sounds like a pilot. I mean, what’s your job? What do you do for a living? My aunt and uncle are farmers on the ranch, that sort of thing.” Luke carefully explained. 

Yeah, I knew that. You didn’t have to remind me of their insignificant vocational choices.

“I am ... ehh——” What should he say? 

Supreme Leader of the First Order? Ehuh, too many follow up questions.

Future ruler of the galaxy? Same problem.

A Sith Lord? A Dark Force user? Jedi Killer? Eww, too brutal for a kid.

Wait, why did he care whether it’s brutal or not? Just forget it.

A smuggler? Tsk tsk tsk, too degenerating.

Fuck, he should have said that he _was_ a pilot when Luke asked him for the first time. And he should come up with a proper fake job sooner, instead of acting like a dumbass who forgot to close his mouth while thinking for like what, twenty seconds? You moron! Answer the fucking question! How hard could it be? Just think of something! Anything!

Kylo finally found something to say, he said: “I was looking for something.” or is it _someone_? 

Oh boy, that came out completely wrong. He sounded like some scavenger, and a very unsuccessful one.

“Oh.” Luke paused, thought it over for some time, nodded, then said, “Okay, I understand.”

Luke said he understood but his face was saying something absolutely different. Luke’s look was like: I won’t judge you no matter what stupid job you really have.

 _You understand nothing, you idiot!_ Kylo wanted to shout at Luke.

Luke was actually pitying him. This is _fucking insane_.

\---TBC---

And this time I think there won't be a "maybe not". 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went to some playground the other day and saw a bunch of real five-year-olds fighting over a swing. That's when I realize I know nothing about five year old kids. I just wish this fic isn't way too off.  
> Again, if you have anything you'd like to say, please let me know. Feedback is always lovely.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning: Please do mind the updated tag before you read on. There will be inappropriate use of the Force in this chapter.  
> So this is the last chapter, and a quite long one. Enjoy!

Kylo lost track of time.

Everyday was the same. Kylo got up in the morning. All four of them had breakfast together, then the Lars couple went to work on the ranch. And Kylo just followed Luke everywhere he went. They came back in the afternoon, empty handed. Luke would took a nap, Kylo would meditate. Later the Lars couple would return from work. Mr. Lars didn’t talk much. So Mrs. Lars would ask Luke about his day. Although in Kylo’s view nothing particular had happened _at all_ , Luke could babble on and no nonstop for at least half an hour. Kylo always found Luke’s whine was some kind of annoying background noise, making him impossible to concentrate on anything. Somehow Mrs. Lars would smile and nod now and then. It was only Kylo’s wishful thinking that Mrs. Lars merely pretended that she was listening. Well, it wouldn’t matter anyway. Since Luke always got too carried away. Even if Mrs. Lars was indeed not paying attention, Luke couldn’t know, not for the slightest bit.

Afterwards Mrs Lars would thank Kylo for taking good care of Luke for the day and brought up dinner. That was when he felt like being used. Kylo had long suspected that Mrs. Lars had already figured out he didn't end up here because of space jump malfunction. However as long as he played the role of free babysitter, Mrs. Lars had no intention to pursuit the truth. He should be pissed, enraged even. But dinner was Kylo’s favorite part of the day. _Oh dear, now he sounded like a three-year-old._ It’s just dinner’s food was much better than that of breakfast. He didn’t even know what did they have for breakfast, and he dared not to ask.

A standard week must have passed before luck _finally_ decided to knock on his door. When they caught sight on another _stinkylight_ , Kylo grabbed it in one swift move, yanked it out of sands before Luke even said a word, and then clenched it firmly with two hands, almost too tight to crush it, as if his very life was depend on it. And oh, he _would_ thank the Maker, and whatever mystical beings above. That very night, when Luke stepped into his room, he sprung out of bed, raced to turn on the lights, and bid Luke to leave the jar on the nightstand. This time, nothing broke.

Kylo was beyond relieved after Luke turned off the lights and left, he gradually drifted off while staring at the dim light from the glass jar.

Next morning, he woke up wondering, what would they do today? He wouldn’t deny that there was a teeny tiny little part of him was looking _forward_ to it. He was so sick of that meaningless lizard hunting, it would be good to have something else to do for a change.

“Hey there. Where do you think you are going to without me?” Kylo was surprised when he found out that Luke tried to sneak away without him, “Your aunt specifically said you are not to wander around alone.”

Luke’s face soured, then Kylo suddenly realized that he sounded exactly like a nagging father. He was _so_ fucked up.

“Oh, I’m gonna visit some of my friends.” Luke hesitated for a bit, “Are you sure you wanna come with me?”

Visiting friends? So ... more five-year-olds? Nah. Picturing a bunch of simple-minded kids screaming at each other had already gave him a headache. Luke saw the reluctance on Kylo’s face and this cunning little jerk took advantage of it without hesitation.

“They don’t live far, and I will be back before aunt and uncle.” Luke hopefully suggested.

Perhaps it’s for the best, then. 

Kylo dismissed Luke with a wave of his hand. Luke disappeared happily into endless sands sooner than he’d thought.

_Huh, what should he do today?_

He mediated for some time, which was no good. The door was still shut close. Then he tried some physical exercises. It didn't feel right without his light saber or a proper training staff. He made do with push-ups and several other moves, but soon got bored of it.

The sun was getting late. It was about the time when they usually turned back. There was no sign of Luke. Kylo was rattled, and he kind of despised himself for it. Luke meant _nothing_ to him. He tried to track down Luke’s force signature but failed. It’s not that there was a special connection between them, like the force bond between him and Rey. And Luke’s too young, his signature was too weak to discern from long distance.

There should be nothing to worry about. Kylo had been in these sands for at least a week, and the most dangerous thing he had come across was that sand snake which he mistook the other day. Since Luke was so afraid of snakes, he ought to know how to avoid them. And he should be with his friends now, shouldn’t he? He would be fine.

But Kylo had forgotten, that sometimes kids are the _worst_.

Before long, Luke came back. Kylo was going to tell Luke off about being late when Luke walked straight past Kylo, rushed into his room and shut the door behind him.

_What the fuck?_

Kylo reached out his Force. Luke was upset. Something bad had happened.

He knocked on the door, “Luke, open up.”

Only silence answered him.

“Luke, open the door.” This time he said it more sternly.

There were rustles in the room, then the door cracked. Kylo pushed in and found Luke was—— in a _mess_. Luke looked like he had got into some huge fight. He’s got faintly dark circle around his eye, and his lower lip was broken, there were scratches all over his arm.

Kylo was astounded. He sat down on the edge of Luke's bed. “What happened?” He demanded. 

“Nothing, it’s nothing. I fell on a rock.” Luke made it an understatement.

_No, the kid was lying._

“Tell me the truth.”

Luke shook his head and refused to talk.

Patience was never Kylo’s strength, so he just took what he wanted, like he always did. And what he had seen in Luke’s mind almost made him lost control.

It started all well, Luke found his little buddies. Some silly boys enjoyed some childish games which he had absolutely no interest in. And then—— so there _was_ a fight—— shit happened. It started with Luke bragging about his _father_. 

_That’s why Luke didn’t want him to go today._

Oh, how excited Luke was, to finally have a parent that he could brag about. He had used to listen longingly to his friends talking about their parents, wishing to have one of his own. Luke was so eager to announce that his father had come back, that his father was _perfect_. He was no longer an orphan and his father was tall, athletic, patient, willing to go catching lizard with him for days.

Unsurprisingly, none of Luke’s _friends_ believed him. They had never seen Luke’s parents, after all. They claimed Luke was hallucinating, imagining things because he’d wanted it too much. They said if Luke wished to prove his words, he should let them follow Luke home, paying a visit to his so-called father. And of course Luke couldn’t let them. Because Kylo had emphasized over and over again that he was NOT his father. Then those awful kids laughed at Luke. Luke was sad and angry, they got into a fight. It wasn’t even a fair fight. Luke started it and was on his own. He was helpless and defenseless, basically got beaten up towards the end.

The worst part was, it was not the first time that those shitheads were making fun of Luke. They had always said rubbish about Luke’s father, about that Luke was abandoned because his own father didn’t want him.

That’s bullshit! Luke’s father didn’t even know that Luke ever existed! And, well, Darth Vader was indeed stupid enough never to notice Senator Amidala was pregnant. See? That’s the problem when you don’t have sex education in Jedi course. What was the saying again? Those who can’t _do_ , _teach_! Fucking stupid Jedi! Fuck their rules and doctrines. No wonder that grandpa had left.

Kylo didn’t know where did his sudden urge of protectiveness come from. But he knew he should do something, he should kill all of them. Yet in his hasty search he had seen _more_ , more than he should already not see.

It turned out that during the previous days, Luke had way more questions which he wanted to ask, to ask about _family_. What did mother look like? Was she pretty? How did you meet her? How did she die? Do I have any brothers or sisters? Luke never asked _those_ questions. Because deep down Luke seemed to know he wouldn’t get answers from him.

Kylo even caught glimpse of Luke secretively admiring his body, wishing to be tall, strong and all muscled up one day.

And the fact that Luke _was_ happy, genuinely happy just to be with him everyday.

These unexpected findings somehow quenched his murderous impulse, yet he was still furious.

“What—— How _dare_ they! Where are they now?” 

It doesn’t matter. He will find out. He’s gonna make them _pay_. 

Kylo stood up and left the house, heading towards sands with long strides. Luke sat frozen. Luke was still too young to realize it was _wrong_ to read people’s mind without permission. He didn’t even feel violated, and a part of him was delighted, even exulted that finally someone, his _father_ was going to defend him. Then he thought of something. He hurriedly trotted behind Kylo to catch up.

“Don’t.” Luke grabbed his sleeve, “Please.”

Kylo snapped, “Why would you stop me? They had the nerve to treat you like that, they are to pay for what they did.”

“But they are not wrong!” Luke started to cry now. He didn’t cry when his friends mocked him, and he didn’t shed a single tear when he fought them and hurt himself. But now hot tears were running down his cheeks.

“They are wrong about _everything_!”

“No! I had known that! I guess I knew it all along!” Luke whimpered, “I knew you are NOT my father! I just, I just wish that you were!”

“You——” Kylo was _shocked_ , not only because of Luke’s sudden confession, but the _door_. He sensed that the door to the hidden path opened, it was calling him, he could go back to where and when he came from now.

Suddenly it all made sense. Rey’s parents left her in that desert, breaking her heart. She had prayed for nothing but to have them back. Her return to the desert brought back her childhood desperation. And here at this end young little Luke desperately wanted a father. That’s why he ended up here. Luke had _pulled_ him here. He would be trapped in this place as long as Luke refused to face the reality. And now, just like that, Luke let him go.

Kylo's instinct told him that the door won’t stay open for long. He had to leave, and the sooner the better. It is now or never. But somehow he wished he could stay a bit longer. He wanted to go and hunt down those evil little shitheads, kick their asses and tell them he _is_ the Father. And Luke’s father _is_ a badass. No one is to mess up with Luke ever again. Yet he can’t. 

“Luke, Luke. Listen to me.” Kylo drew a deep breath, steadied himself and coated Luke’s mind with his Force. He didn’t have much time. He knelt down in one knee so that Luke could look him in the eye without straining his neck. He cupped Luke’s face with his hands and swept Luke’s tear with his thumbs.

“Listen. You will forget me. I am but a stranger that you can’t remember his face.” Kylo paused a little then added “and his name” to be sure.

Luke repeated his words with a blank face, “I will forget you. You are a stranger. I can’t remember your face or name.”

“Now go home, tell your aunt and uncle that the stranger has left when they come back.”

Luke turned for home.

It happened so fast, _too_ fast. Kylo watched Luke walking away for a while, he felt that he had forgotten something. 

“Wait!”

Luke turned around, his eyes were still glazed.

Kylo went forward, bent down, took Luke’s little hands in his own.

“Your father, your _real_ father, he ... he loves you.” That’s the only thing he could do, and he wasn’t exactly lying.

Luke blinked and seemed confused, as though he didn’t understand what Kylo was saying. He was still under the influence of the Force, and a few seconds later Luke nodded, and said, “I know.” His small fingers trailed out of Kylo’s big ones as he turned back once more, heading home.

So this is it, this is the end of his brief, bizarre journey.

Kylo Ren straightened his back and began to walk towards the place calling him, he knew when he got back, he would do the right thing.

\---The End---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing the end of this story is kind of breaking my heart. But I guess you and I both know we are not gonna have a conventional happy ending since Kylo has to go eventually. I hope you like our cute little Luke and of course grumpy yet sometimes gentle Kylo. And as always I would like to thank my beta reader lzxizxl and all of you guys who ever leave kudos or comments, place bookmark or merely add the hits tally. You are the driving force of my creation and I can't thank you enough.  
> P.S. I meant no offense when I wrote "Those who can't do, teach." It's just a joke. I wish I didn't hurt any feelings.
> 
> Edit: And! I have created a series! So I change the completed date. New work coming soon!


End file.
